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Christmas 2023: Crackers About Law

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Christmas 2023: Crackers About Law

We wish all our clients, contacts and members of the community a Merry Christmas and a healthy, happy and prosperous New Year.

The festive season at Crane & Staples is always an exciting and busy time of year! This year has been no exception!

Please read below to find out key information including our Christmas closure dates, fundraising activities and festive events.

Christmas Closure Dates

Please note that Crane & Staples will be closed from 5.00pm on Friday 22nd December 2023, reopening at 9.00am on Tuesday 2nd January 2024.

Crackers About Law

The theme of our Christmas this year is ‘Crackers About Law’. This is a pun on our passion for law and Christmas. The theme is represented in our office decorations, through Christmas crackers and Nutcrackers.

Christmas Window

Our magical Christmas window, ‘Crackers About Law: Believe in the Magic of Christmas’ was designed by our very talented friend, PaintParty by Rachel. The Nutcracker artwork has been popular with visitors, children and passers-by. Thank you, Rachel!

Christmas Crackers

We designed custom Crane & Staples Christmas crackers to share with contacts and staff.

Thank you to our graphic designer, Kelly Monk, and our printers, Kall Kwik WGC, for producing these beautiful crackers.

Inside the crackers, we included:

  • A festive-smelling wax melt, from our lovely friends at Castaway Cottage.
  • A legal-themed joke.
  • Some festive legal trivia
  • Chocolate
  • An eco-friendly paper hat.

Thank you to Kelly Monk and our friends at Prime printing for making the cracker inserts to show the jokes and trivia.

Lawyer Jokes

Here are the lawyer jokes that we included in the crackers. Whilst we do not agree with these stereotypes, we are happy to laugh at ourselves for a bit of festive fun!

How do you get a group of lawyers to smile for a picture?

Just say “Fees!”

What do lawyers like to drink?

Subpoeña coladas

What happened to the lawyer who didn’t use a luggage tag?

They lost their case.

What did the lawyer name his daughter?


What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.

Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.

What do lawyers wear to Court?

A law suit

What do lawyers need to make any event a success?

At least two parties.

Why did the lawyer have so much trouble fighting Santa's case?

He came with a clause.

Why are lawyers so charming?

They have their own appeal…!

What do you call the only sober person at the lawyers’ Christmas party?

The caterer

Why did the lawyer’s chicken cross the road?

He had an easement.

How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.

What do you get when you cross a librarian with a lawyer?

All the information you need, but you can’t understand a word of it.

Why don’t lawyers play hide-and-seek?

Nobody will bother to look for them.

What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can’t understand.

Thank you to the original writers of these jokes.

Legal Trivia

Here is the festive legal trivia that we included in our crackers.

  • The Salmon Act 1986 makes it illegal to "handle salmon in suspicious circumstances"
  • Between 1647 and 1660, Oliver Cromwell reportedly banned mince pies, Christmas pudding and Christmas celebrations as part of efforts to tackle gluttony in England.
  • It is illegal to sell Christmas crackers to persons younger than 12 years old - The Pyrotechnic Articles (Safety) Regulations 2015.
  • Parliament passed an ordinance banning Christmas in June 1647 and further laws in the following years reinforcing the Christmas ban. The ban was removed in 1660.
  • Under the Christmas Day trading act (2004), any shop that is larger than 3,000 square feet is prohibited from opening.
  • The Metropolitan Police prohibits Londoners from sliding on ice or snow in the street. If found to be sliding on snow, you could be fined up to £500.
  • A dangerous condition clause in The Road Traffic Act 1988 means that having your Christmas tree hanging out of your boot, or on your car roof without a roof rack, could lead to a fine or being pulled over by the police.
  • In England the ‘statutory nuisance’ law (1990) means local councils are obligated to investigate if any complaints are made about artificial lights being too bright.
  • It is illegal to tamper with, open or delay a parcel that is not addressed to you. (The Postal Services Act 2000 section 84)
  • In 1836, under a William IV law, it was illegal to eat more than three courses of Christmas dinner at a restaurant or hotel.
  • In New York City, there is a law prohibiting the display of natural (non-artificial) Christmas trees in retail stores.
  • If you live in Maine, USA, it is illegal to keep your Christmas lights up past 14 January!
  • In Mexico, businesses are legally required to pay their employees an annual Christmas bonus. This is called “Aguinaldo”.
  • In the UK, it is a motor offence to drive before you have removed all the ice from your entire windscreen. You can also be fined for failing to clear snow from the roof of your car before you drive.
  • In the 19th century, it was illegal for women to eat chocolate on public transport.
  • A misinterpretation of the Treason Felony Act, 1848, led people to falsely believe that it was illegal and treasonous to place a stamp upside down on an envelope.

Festive Networking and Nibbles

Our first event of the season was ‘Festive Networking and Nibbles’. This was attended by some of our closest professional contacts and long-term clients. This was a fabulous evening with delicious catering from Bebo.

Attendees also enjoyed having photos in our ‘Crackers About Law’ selfie frame (also designed by Kelly Monk and produced by Kall Kwik).

Thank you to everyone who attended!

Christmas Quiz

Thank you to Sheryl Hartigan for hosting another excellent Christmas Quiz over our lunch hours in the first week of December. There was only 1.5 points separating all the teams!

St Francis Church Christmas Tree Festival

This year, we once again took part in the annual Christmas Tree Festival at St Francis Church in Welwyn Garden City.

We were so impressed with the beautifully decorated trees from local families, businesses, schools and community groups.

We hope everyone enjoyed our 'Crackers About Law' tree, especially the lawyer-themed cracker jokes!

Thank you to St Francis Church for hosting this magical festive event for the 25th year!

Lister Hospital Christmas Grotto

Every year, one of our favourite Christmas traditions is to donate toys to the children's ward at Lister Hospital.

Staff each chose a toy from our local toy store, The Entertainer, that they thought the children would like. This included board games, activity books, construction sets and dolls. Of course, to remember our advert and sponsorship of the Screen on the Green this summer, we included lots of Mario toys!

Thank you to Santa's helpers, Amy and Abbie, for delivering the toys this year. They enjoyed meeting the wonderful team and seeing the magical grotto (especially the Nutcracker!)

We hope all the children, families, patients, and staff at Lister Hospital have a very Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!

Alternative to Christmas Cards

Instead of sending Christmas cards this year, we have made a donation to the Herts Domestic Abuse helpline. This charity is very important to us as a firm and in our local  community.





Secret Santa

Our staff took part in a Secret Santa gift exchange and Santa himself made a special visit.

Christmas Party

We all had a fabulous night at Tewinbury Farm Hotel for our annual Christmas party. Thank you to our DJ, Garden City Discos, and everyone who joined us for such a lovely evening of fun, food and festivities.

Christmas Raffle

This year, the chosen charity for our Christmas Raffle is Parkinson’s UK. This is a charity very close to our hearts. We would like to give a huge thank you to all the fabulous local businesses who have very generously donated to our raffle.

  • Stonehills Hairdressers
  • All About Me Salon
  • Sweetlicious by Rachel
  • Café Trio
  • Greys Hairdressers
  • Castaway Cottage
  • Misya Meze
  • Elley Spa
  • Red Indian Restauraunt

We are delighted to say that we raised £330 for Parkinson's UK in our raffle this year!

Christmas Jumper Day

This year, we took part in the Isabel Hospice Christmas jumper day! Take a look at our festive attire as well as our Mariah Carey lip-sync TikTok video. Thank you to Isabel Hospice for inviting us to join in, we are so pleased to support you.


We wish all our clients, contacts and members of the community a Merry Christmas and a healthy, happy and prosperous New Year.


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